The Cold Treatment

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The podcast where we read your screenplay with literally no preparation. Submit your scripts here!

Episode 22. Lover's Peak

The gang reads a horrific short that is sure to suck the life out of you! (No vampires!) Later, Joe is a prostitute, Mason is a robot, and Shawn gets a new nickname. Also, the first ever on-air phone call is made, a historic moment in Cold Treatment history.

Music:

JD industrial RMX by Deuxvolt, 2 PM Wake UP Call by Apache Tomcat, Chantiers Navals 412 by LJ Kruzer, Interlude - "Reading The Greens" by Hogan Grip, Night Terrors by Port City Music, Suck City by Black Math, Beyond The End by Deuxvolt

 

Episode 21. The Montenegrin Seaslug

The gang reads a film noir parody. Later, Mason teaches us what "saccharine" means, Shawn pitches James Franco to everyone, and Joe doesn't even exist.

Music: Heroes of the Teslapunk by Tri-Tachyon, Dances and Dames by Kevin MacLeod, Night on the Dock - Sax by Kevin MacLeod, Noir Theme by Pk Jazz Collective, I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Ice Cream by Waring's Pennsylvania.

 

Episode 20. The Wheels on The Bus

The gang reads a comedic short which thrusts them into a wacky adventure that doesn't break for anyone. Later, they talk about Tom Hanks and belts (the kind you wear) for some reason and make fun of the way Joe pronounces things.

Music:

Mickey Maos by Halloween, hmm ok by Gabl, Have You Seen It? by Dr. Frankenstein, Sunpowered Surfboard by The Vivisectors, O v e r t i m e  M a t r i x by Anonymous420, Evil Makings by Halloween, Stance Gives You Balance by Hogan Grip

Written by Brittaney Walters and Zack Walters

 

Episode 19. Seeds of Eternity

The gang reads a heartwarming British short about a father-son conflict. Later, the conversation tackles a wide variety of topics ranging from Shakespeare to hypothetically having mayonnaise for ejaculate.

Music:

Undercover Vampire Policeman by Chris Zabriski, Seeing the Future by Dexter Britain, Blizzard (PON I) by Kai Engel, Endless Story About Sun and Moon by Kai Engel, Heart and Mind by Kai Engel, Aluminum by Rizke, The Spirit of Russian Love by Zinaida Trokai

 

Episode 18. Don't Be Afraid

The gang reads a short script casting them as an African American family in an apocalyptic city. Later, they mostly talk about chewing gum.

Music: Poligamia by U.M.M., Drown by Altered:Carbon, Runsten by Are Sonor, Godsstation by Our Last Hope Lost Hope, Lift-off by Michett

 

Episode 17. Templars

The gang doesn't discover hidden American treasure in this one, but they do consider buying an oculus rift while they perform a cold read of a sci-fi fantasy pilot.

 

Episode 16. Red Velvet

The gang celebrates Mason's birthday by reading a beautifully depressing story about cupcakes.

Music: R.E.D. by A Tribe Called Red, Take Me To The River by The Talking Heads, Various Soundtrack Music by Kevin McLeod

 

Episode 15. Nursing Home

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of nursing home based drama. Later, Joe misses an obvious plot point, Shawn leads us onto tangents on 90s movies and capitalizing on tragedy, and Mason sings us happy birthday.

 

Music: Chopin Makuza Op67 No3 by Blue Dot Sessions, Chopin Etude in A-flat, Op. 23 no. 1 by Michal Hamburg, The Last V8 (Paino Cover) by Christian Vestergaard, Sweet Georgia Brown by Latché Swing, Stardust by US Army Blues, Chopin Prelude Op 23 No 4 by Paul Cantrell.

 

Episode 14. Applied Philosopy

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short philosophical narrative. Later, Mason teaches us about the Library of Babel, Joe complains about the writer's name, and Shawn impersonates Pharrell Williams.

Applied Philosophy written by George White

Music:

Epic Song by BoxCat Games, Across the River by Podington Bear, Sad Cyclops by Podington Bear, Tomie's Bubbles by Candlegravity, Ancient Heavy Tech Donjon by Komiku

 

Episode 13. The Dairy Farmer's Daughter

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a dairy-based psychological thriller. Followed by a heated argument in which Shawn rails against "literal lactose intolerance", and a blooper reel loaded with some very disturbing sounds.

Script written by Matthew Portman

Music: Boulevard of St. Germain by Jahzzar, Railroad Whiskey by Jahzzar, Nothing by Kai Engel, Anxiety by Kai EngelHustle by Kevin MacLeod

 

Episode 12. Paint The City Blue

The gang performs a cold read of a Seattle crime drama.

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music

 

Episode 11: Stuck Back

Joe, Shawn, & Mason are joined by special guest Max R. Holland to perform a cold read of a coming-of-age homecoming dramedy.

Music: Frozen Egg by Lame Drivers, Swan Song by Paper Navy, Solo Acoustic Guitar by Jason Shaw, Little Chance by Jahzzar, Fireworks by Jahzzar

 

Episode 10: Bait

Joe, Shawn, & Mason perform a cold read of a otherworldly surreal sci-fi comedy.

Bait written by Daniel Bracey

Check out the film version here!

Music: Happytime by Podington Bear, Hotel Rodeo by Anitek feat. DSpliff, The Last Question by Lee Rosevere, Hopes and Dreams by Kai Engel, Afterglow by Podington Bear, Celestials by Mean Moon, Mello Hello by J1*

 

Episode 9: Lovelock

Joe, Shawn, & Mason perform a cold read of a black sci-fi comedy.

Music: Belview by C. Scott, Raw Instrumental Pt. 1 by Digi G'Alessio, Runtime Error by Peter Sharp, Five Minutes at the Rainforest Cafe by Macaw, Favorite Secrets by Waylon Thornton, Gods Among Men by Prox-C

 

Episode 8: Fuck! Zombies!

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a horrifying webisode!

 Music: Zombie by The Cranberries, Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

 

Episode 7: Coffee Date

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short romance. 

Coffee Date written by Bronson West

Music: Night Owl by Broke For Free, Hachiko (The Faithful Dog) by The Kyoto Connection, Jupiter the Blue by Gillicuddy, Big Gay Water Fight by Plushgoolash, Take Me Higher by Jahzzar

 

Episode 6: God Bless FM Radio

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short groovy thriller. 

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

Watch the film version HERE!

 

Episode 5: Intel

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short science fiction thriller.

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

 

Episode 4: Follow

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short political drama.

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

 

Episode 3: A Crazy Salty Thing Called Love

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short comedy.

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

 

Episode 2: A Date With Death

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short romance.

Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music 

 

Episode 1: Super

Joe, Shawn, and Mason perform a cold read of a short drama.

Music: In The Hall Of The Mountain King by Edvard Grieg, Royalty Free Music by Kevin Macleod - www.incompetech.com/music